The Wallet Experiment
by WeBuiltThePyramids
Summary: A oneshot in Savannah!Verse (related to The Parental Ambition and The Sulfur Juxtaposition). Rated T for some innuendos. Features Penny, Leonard, Savannah, Ada, Gilda. "T'was two days before Christmas, and all through the day, light bulbs and Santa's not going their way."


**So for Christmas I thought I'd give all my lovely readers a glimpse into the future lives of Penny, Leonard, Savannah, and Ada. This is set at Christmas, but isn't really a Christmas fic. It's just a quick oneshot in "Savannah!Verse." My long novella type fics for these guys are likely over, but I'll probably do random oneshots with this family, set at different, random points, if people like this one and are interested in more of them.**

**This one takes place four years after The Sulfur Juxtaposition ends – so eight years after the end of The Parental Ambition. Just a quick glimpse into the lives of the Hofstadters.**

* * *

Penny was happy to back up the driveway and see her youngest daughter skipping around the perimeter of the house with their small dog bounding next to her. Penny was not so amused to enter the house after so long and find Gilda sprawled out on the couch, the dryer beeping incessantly, and her husband sitting on the floor exactly where she'd left him. "Leonard, you have a PhD. Why has it taken you three hours to fix the lamp?"

"In my defense," Leonard said, "I spent all but the last twenty minutes of that playing Star Wars Monopoly with Savannah."

"How is that in your defense?" Penny asked.

"She got the Coruscant Senate first time around the board. From then on it was just a waiting game for me to run out of money."

"I'm surprised he hung in there for more than two hours," Gilda said. "Though it helped that he told Savannah that she wasn't allowed to buy the Temple until she went around the board as many times as her age."

"And then I still couldn't land on it first," Leonard lamented.

"I've got an idea," Penny said, setting her bag down on the counter top. "Next year, don't play games until the house is ready for everyone to come over for Christmas dinner."

"Christmas isn't for two days!" Gilda said.

"Penny's been a little overly prepared for everything since we moved in," Leonard said, standing up to kiss his wife's cheek. "It's the first time either of us has owned a house, you know."

"Thanks for the backup, honey," Penny said, smiling at him.

"Aw, anytime," he said. "Seriously though," he said in a lower voice, "we've lived here for two years, I think it's time to calm down."

Penny playfully pushed him away. "Excuse me, with us, Howard and Bernadette, the Koothrapalis, Shamy, and Gilda, Iris, and Mark, we've got fifteen people to feed on Christmas and waiting until the last minute is just going to send my stress levels through the roof and I'm well aware no one wants to be around me when I'm like that!"

"Oh, you don't have to tell us that," Gilda said. "So if we're looking for a new topic," she continued when Penny glared, "Iris asked her father today how Daddies are involved in a baby since the baby grows inside the mother."

"Were we looking for a new topic?" Leonard asked, looking slightly uncomfortable. He looked at Penny. "Were we looking for a new topic?"

"What did you tell her?" Penny asked, beginning to transfer the food from the grocery bags to the refrigerator. "When did you _get here_?"

"About an hour ago. Mark just sort of stared at her for a few minutes and then told her to ask me because apparently I love talking about that sort of thing."

"That's not totally inaccurate," Leonard pointed out.

"This is different!" Gilda said. "Iris is my daughter. I don't want her thinking about me and Mark like that."

"By the time I was her age my mother had had me read several papers on the subject," Leonard said. "There were even diagrams and Polariods."

Penny and Gilda wrinkled their noses.

"How did your parents explain it all to you?" Leonard asked. "I'm sure it was a much more appropriate and far less scarring discussion."

"Well, I did use diagrams on my board, but based on how it was explained to me as a kid. My mom told me that you needed to put the plug in the socket for the light to turn on," Gilda said.

Leonard looked uncomfortable. "I don't want to see if the lamp works now."

"Leonard, if it doesn't work I have to run out and get new light bulbs before it gets dark," Penny said. Took the plug from him, knelt, and shoved it into the outlet.

The bulb lit up brightly for the briefest instant, then there was a hissing sound and it fizzled out.

"Mmmm," Leonard said. "No one wants to be that guy."

"Is there a guy here?"

Leonard turned his head. "Savannah, where'd you get the popsicle? We're having dinner in fifteen minutes."

"The freezer," Savannah said. "That's where you find popsicles."

"Savannah," Penny said, raising her eyebrows. "There's no need for sarcasm."

"He axed an obvious question!"

"_Asked._ And just because Santa's already packing his sleigh doesn't mean he doesn't know if you're rude to your father."

"Santa's not even real," Savannah said. "I'm eight years old and Stephen Hawking said he likes me better than Uncle Sheldon. That doesn't happen to someone who believes there's a man who can travel to every house on Earth in the space of one night."

"You may be eight, but your sister is only four," Penny said. "She thinks Santa _is_ real."

"No she doesn't," Savannah said. "Last year we took money out of your wallets when you were asleep and if Santa was real he'd have known and not brought us presents."

"Hold on," Leonard said to Penny, who looked angry. "Savannah, are you telling me that you and Ada _did an experiment_ to prove whether or not Santa was real?"

"Yes," Savannah said. "I even wrote it down."

"Are you mad?" Leonard said to Penny. "Because personally, I'm kinda proud."

The front door opened, and their younger daughter came in, the little brown dog following after her. "Did you and Luke have a good walk?" Penny said, ignoring her husband.

"Yes," Ada said, unhooking the Pomeranian. Luke bounded across the room and jumped at what remained of Savannah's popsicle "We stayed in the yard."

"I saw you. Very good," Penny said. "So what do you think of Santa?"

"He doesn't see me when you're sleeping." She and Savannah giggled. Penny and Leonard looked at each other in annoyance.

"Is it cold out there?" Leonard asked, turning back to Ada. "Your glasses are fogged up."

"A little," she said. "When is dinner?

"Mommy's gotta run to the store and get another light bulb," Penny said. "You guys can eat as soon as the timer goes off." She stood up. "Ada, brush your hair, it looks like a bird made a nest."

"Yes, Mommy," Ada said. "Sav-nanna, can you brush my hair?"

"Okay!" Savannah dropped her popsicle stick in the garbage and the girls ran off toward the bedrooms.

"I still say little Nevada looks like a kid version of Leslie Winkle," Gilda joked.

"We prefer 'female version of Leonard'," Penny said.

"No, I'm thinking…are you sure she's yours, Penny?" Gilda raised an eyebrow dramatically.

"Oh, she's mine," Penny said. "I've got the scar to prove it."

"Well, I gotta take off," Gilda said, smiling. "Mark and Iris will be home soon. I'll come over early on Christmas if you want, to help with the food."

"Sounds good," Leonard said.

"Oh, Gilda!" Penny said, rushing over to the coffee table and picking up the Monopoly game. "Take this with you."

"Hey…" Leonard protested.

She grinned and kissed him. "You can have it back after Christmas dinner."

* * *

**So there you go – just a short bit, a quick jump to the future. If I write future oneshots, some will take place before this one, some after. And the Santa experiment mentioned in this fic is how my sister and I figured out that it was our parents leaving the presents, and I thought it sounded like something someone on this show would do.**


End file.
